The Dateinkenya Blog

First Date with a Woman: How to Start Conversation with a Woman on Your First Date! – Part 2

13th February, 2010 - Posted by admin - No Comments

Quite a few men feel nervous if there are silences and find themselves blurting out things they didn’t mean to say. You can avoid being one of those unfortunate guys by having a few ideas in your mind that make interesting conversation starters. A little preparation ensures that you’ll never run out of things to talk about. Here are some timeless ideas to keep the conversation going:

1) Avoid lame questions – The most important thing you want to remember is to ask open-ended questions that help your date talk about themselves. Instead of asking them boring questions like – “Where did you study?” try “Did you enjoy studying ______ or what was your experience of studying ______?” This allows her to give you more information than simply say ‘yes’ or ‘no’ or name places, things etc. Open-ended questions give your date a chance to reveal more about herself and her take on the experiences she went through.

2) Explore how she spends her time – Asking your date a question like what she likes to do in her free time or after work or on the weekends will help you to figure out if you have the same type of interests or like to do the same things. This will give you a good idea about the types of activities she likes, events she likes to go to etc. which is a great thing to know to plan any future dates with her if things go well.

3) Get her talking about her family – Always a safe topic to explore, asking your date to tell you a little bit about her family is sure to help you learn a bit more about her personality. Asking her who she is close to, who her favorite grandparents, aunts or uncles are etc. will shed light on details that have influenced her and made her who she is today.

4) Talk about highs and lows – Asking her about the highs and lows of her day, week or month is a fantastic way to get the conversation going. Share your experiences too. She may be intrigued by the new restaurant you’ve discovered or you may find that you have a lot more in common when she talks about a great new music CD she’s come across.

5) Best Travel Experiences – We have all been somewhere or hope to visit an exotic location someday. Talking about past travel destinations and the type of traveling she likes to do is a good conversation starter. You’ll discover her idea of a getaway, whether it’s taking it easy by lazing around on a beach or hiking up the slopes of a mountain. Not only does this open up the way for you to suggest a trip somewhere, but you’ll also get a good idea of how adventurous she is – whether she loves meeting new people or not and what her idea of a great trip looks like. You can expand travel to include places you’ve lived in or hope to live in for more conversational fodder.

6) Beloved Foods – You can’t go wrong when you broach the subject of beloved foods! We all go ga-ga over something, be it freshly baked bread or a slice of chocolate truffle. Finding out what she has a weakness for, the foods she enjoys, whether she loves to cook or not etc., is a delicious way to spend time together. If she’s a foodie you can base future dates around taking her to a new cafe or restaurant to sample her favorite foods. If she can’t boil an egg to save her life then maybe taking a cooking class together could be an activity worth exploring that’ll help you to spend more time with her.

7) Work – Does she love what she does for a living? Is she stuck in a dead-end job with no future or is she engaged in a dead-end job to pay the bills while she studies something else part-time? Talking about her work will give you clues as to whether she has a vision for herself, is planning a career or is just content to be laid back and live in the moment. While there isn’t anything wrong with the latter it’s smarter to know this going in. If you are a go-getter type you may not be quite compatible with her or she may be just what you need to balance out your more intense personality.

8 ) Relationships – Talking of relationships can be tricky but it’s a worthwhile topic to get into. Don’t ask her about her past relationships or regale her with stories of your past breakups. That’s too much information, too soon and it may just get tedious especially if either of you have had bad breakups that you still get frazzled over. You can approach the area of relationships from a more positive angle by asking her the following – “What kind of relationship are you looking for? What’s your vision of a great relationship?”

It’s a neat way to find out exactly what she is looking for at the moment so you both don’t waste any of the other’s time. If she’s only looking to meet people and have some light-hearted fun without getting too serious then you know how things stand. You can avoid setting yourself up for disappointment especially if you are on the lookout for a serious relationship yourself.

9) Circle of Friends – Is she an outgoing social butterfly or more of a lone ranger? Who does she hang out with? How did she meet them and what does she like or admire about them? You’ll get to know more about what she values in people when she talks about her circle of friends. She’ll love talking about the people she cares about and if things work out, her friends are going to be your friends as well so it’s good to pay attention!

10) Hobbies – What kind of hobbies does she like to spend time on? If she’s too busy with work, what kind of hobbies would she give time to if she were free? These types of questions give your date a lot of leeway to talk about things that excite and inspire her. You may be delighted to find that she shares your interests or be fascinated to learn more about the different areas she’s interested in.